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Saturday, May 23, 2009

MAY 23, 2009 SEX WITH A COWBOY.. ..


MAY 23, 2009
  SEX WITH A COWBOY.. ..



SEX WITH A COWBOY...
 A very glamorus,, and expensively dressed blonde New Yorker with a high powered executives job, who was known as Buffy to all her close friends...  was going on vacation in Texas!
 Prior to her trip ,  Buffy confided to her friends she had three goals for her trip to the Lone Star State.
    Number One ....  She wanted to taste some real Texas Bar-B-Que.
  Number Two.....   She wanted to take in a bona fide rodeo.
  AND FINALLY!....
  Number Three.......   She wanted to have sex with a real cowboy .



    Ten days later Buffy returned from her trip with a nice tan and blisters on her hind end from riding a horse for the first time in her life.

  Her girlfriends were dying to ask her about the goals she had told them about..

 Especially  about the sex. with a real live cowboy!

It was just too exciting to bear it much longer in the dark.!
  So when Buffy invited them all to lunch to tell all about her trip and give each one a gift from Texas, they practically ran up her arm from the waiting to find out how all had gone..
  They all but pounced on her as soon as they were all seated..

"GIVE IT UP BUFFY..
TELL US " ALL " ABOUT IT!
  So Buffy proceeded to relate the events of her trip..
 First Question was Did you eat real Texas bar-b-que?
   Buffy replied, "Let me tell you, they have a tree down there called a Mesquite and when they slow cook that brisket over that Mesquite, her eyes rolled back in her head and she almost moaned .. "The taste is unbelievable!"
  The girls thought this to be a good sign of tales to come.. so asked eagerly, " Did you make it to see a real live rodeo with cowboys and cows and horses?"
  Buffy got a far away look in her eyes and sighed,
  "I went to a real rodeo. Talk about athletes...those Texas cowboys have muscles on top of their muscles!  Believe it or not.. They wrestle full grown bulls!  They ride horses at a full gallop, then jump off the horses and grab the bull by the horns and throw them to the ground!
  Heaving a large sigh, Buffy breathed..

 " It is just incredible!"
  Not being able to stand one more second of suspense the friends all asked in unison,"
   "Well tell us , did you have sex with a real cowboy?"



Buffys' eyes grew huge in her face and a stricken look appeared, and she exclaimed,"
  "Are you kidding me?!"
   When I saw the outline of the condom they carry in the back pocket of their jeans,
  NO WAY COULD I HANDLE THAT!!!!"



  BROUGHT TO YOU BY...









lockerridge
   

Thursday, May 21, 2009

MAY 21, 2009 IN 1924 THE THINGS WE COULD THINK OF WERE AMAZING!

       
       
       
MAY 21, 2009
 IN 1924
 THE THINGS
WE COULD THINK OF WERE AMAZING!

  
     
The M29 Weasel
I received an email with a link to a video, that captured my attention completely! So I thought if I was intrigued some of you might also like to see it,  with that thought in mind, I am presenting it to you today.

 In 1924 we had something in this country that is so sadly lacking today.
In a time of microwave instantaneous material possession, which quality does not enter into the equation, this video of a machine invented by Armstead Motors is pretty special indeed.
Here is a little of the background on the machine which eventually became the prototype for something the army used in WWII and is still using today.
SOURCE:Wikipedia
In the 1920s the Armstead Snow Motor was developed. When this was used to convert a Fordson tractor into a screw propelled vehicle with a single pair of cylinders; the combination became known as the Fordson Snow Devil. A film was made to show the capabilities of the vehicle as well as a Chevrolet car fitted with an Armstead Snow Motor. The film clearly shows that the vehicle copes well in snow. Steering was effected by having each cylinder receive power from a separate clutch which, depending on the position of the steering gear, engages and disengages; this results in a vehicle that is relatively manoeuvrable. The promotional film shows the Armstead snow motor hauling 20 tons of logs.
In January 1926, Time magazine reported:
       Having used the motor car for almost every other conceivable purpose, leading Detroit automobile makers have now organized a company entitled "Snow Motors Inc.," to put out a machine which will negotiate the deepest snowdrifts at six to eight miles an hour. The new car will consist of a Ford tractor power-plant mounted on two revolving cylinders instead of wheels—something on the order of a steam roller.
 The machine has already proved its usefulness in deep snow previously unnavigable. One such machine has done the work which formerly required three teams. In Oregon a stage line uses a snow motor in its two daily round trips over the Mackenzie Pass between Eugene and Bend. Orders are already in hand from Canada, Norway, Sweden, and Alaska.
 The Hudson Bay Co. has ordered a supply to maintain communications with its most northern fur-trading stations. The Royal Northwest Mounted Police have also gone into the market for snow motors, and may cease to be horsemen and become chauffeurs, to the deep regret of cinema people.
 A number of prominent motor makers have also been interested in the proposition from the angle of adapting the snow motors equipment to their ordinary models. Hudson, Dodge and Chevrolet are mentioned especially as interested in practical possibilities along this line.
 
Armstead Snow Motors from Seeking Michigan on Vimeo.
  This is a 16mm demo film of the Armstead Snow Motors Company concept snow vehicle,  filmed in 1924. There is no sound with this video.
The concept is applied to a Fordson tractor and a Chevrolet automobile. The original film is part of the collections of the Archives of Michigan.
See the original patent at:
 Patent of Armstead Weasel
 To See Video Origin Click Here

lockerridge
  
   
   

This is for Danis eyes only!

             
       
       
WHAT DO YOU THINK SIS?

I HAVE BEEN PLAYING WITH THIS SITE AND THESE TABLES TILL MY BUTT HAS SUCKED UP THE CHAIR INTO IT!
I THINK THIS IS SOMETHING YOU WOULD LIKE..

YES?

 I DO ANYWAY
..Lets take the loudness of the message down a bit into lower case.. let a lockie know if this is what you would like and I will send the code in email.. and tell you how to change the colors of the borders yourself!
 It is too cool!I
 love ya honey!
terri
   
   

Friday, May 15, 2009

MAY 15, 2006 JACKSONS GIFT FROM AUNT DANI

 
MAY 15, 2006  
 JACKSONS GIFT
 FROM AUNT DANI

Photobucket
My bestest friend here .. Dani..  has sent Jackson a toy he thinks is just wonderful!
I made a little video to show his Aunt Dani just how much he loves it…  You will notice the total destruction of my house. This is a direct result of having a 10 week old puppy living in your home...
How he gets the black stuff on the kitchen floor.. I have yet to figure out.
I have a tip for would be future owner of a puppy in the house.. Invest in a little machine called…

 “THE DIRT DEVIL SPOT SCRUBBER”
39.95 for the scrubber… another 10.00 for the carpet shampoo for pet odors. Best money I ever spent in my entire life besides the

 “NO BARK COLLAR”
That cost me another forty bucks, but worked so well I didn't even have to put it on the dog.. just laid it on the counter and wala!
No more barking.. 
a true miracle product..

Jackson says.. "Woof Woof Woof WoOf"
...." Woof Woof WOOF!"

That means..

THANK YOU AUNT DANI!
I LOVE IT!
          ON WITH THE SHOW!

                        
lockerridge

Thursday, May 14, 2009

MAY 14, 2009 UNITED FRIENDS WRITERS GROUP CHALLENGE NUMBER ONE HUNDRED FORTY-FOUR....

MAY 14, 2009
 UNITED FRIENDS CHALLENGE NUMBER
ONE HUNDRED FORTY-FOUR....

I AM EVERYWHERE


   Spaceeagles' Challenge
Write a poem or story using the phrase "the voluminous clouds."

I AM EVERYWHERE
I am everywhere
I am in the east
I am in the west
I am in the south
Look over there to the north
I am everywhere
I can bring laughter until tears flow
See the voluminous clouds
of dust
From the panicked feet of people
Whom I have their every trust
I come into your home on wire
Or float through the air wave upon wave
Even printed on paper twice daily
Seeking ears and eyes to assail gaily
Of this I never tire
I cover the globe
With those seeking
To capture photos 
Of those who are famous
When they are disrobed
From politics to poisoned food
I am always there
To ruin a good mood
I am happiest when people
Sit and brood.
They are aware I am this way
Why they even pay
To see my reports of things black
To listen to the words of things always dire and gray
I am the media
I am everywhere
If what I say is not true
No one seems to care
I give them all something
They can share!

The End
Terri McCain/lockerridge

For more poems and stories click the link below
UNITED FRIENDS WRITERS GROUP



lockerridge

Monday, May 11, 2009

MAY 11, 2009 UNITED FRIENDS WRITERS GROUP CHALLENGE NUMBER ONE HUNDRED AND FORTY THREE....HOMEWORK IN THE 21ST CENTURY ! ? !

MAY 11, 2009
 UNITED FRIENDS WRITERS GROUP CHALLENGE NUMBER
 ONE HUNDRED AND FORTY THREE....
HOMEWORK IN THE 21ST CENTURY








Lockerridge's Challenge
Write an amusing story about a homework assignment that you had as an elementary or high school student
.Just write as if you were in your kitchen, relating the story, over a cup of coffee with good friends.



The following story is a blog I posted on Yahoo 360 a couple of years ago.  I have edited it, in hopes of improving its entertainment value, by using a few of the skills I have learned from being a part of this group. It is based on a true story and is the whole story., nothing has been changed to protect anyone,  because none of us were innocent!


HOMEWORK IN THE
 TWENTY FIRST CENTURY

     I have had something come home to me recently,  that concerns the type of homework assignments that are given to the young adults about to graduate from High School.

My stepson, Jeff,  is a class member of that group of elite males and females, in the long fought for, class of seniors this year.
 He is also a member of a class with the impressive sounding name of Parenting for Responsible Young Adults.
Hummm..... I am yet to be impressed.
My reasoning in my lack of enthusiasm is this..  he is taking the class along with 17 other seniors who had to take the class so they could actually fill in their school day to get to the next class, which is truly a worthwhile and needed class.. of  keyboarding.
 The placement of the class at this particular time of day, forces these students to take it or not round out their schedules.. so in essence it is a forced fluff class that the state has demanded that the schools offer and no one wants to take.

Although this is evident to most anyone who has the brains to notice a bumble bee when it flies up your nose,  the teacher of this class,  takes it seriously.
 Very seriously!
 She managed to talk the school board into buying three, not one, but three  teaching tools called,  "real babies". The price that was paid for these teaching tools, was three hundred dollars a piece!
 What ever happened to the smelly memo-graphed sheets we used to get?
 They cost what?
Half a cent each? humm......
These baby dolls come in a variety of skin colors, and of course, both sexes. Jeff got a girl baby with caucasian skin color. They are anatomically correct as well as have the ability to scream bloody murder, drink a bottle and need a diaper change.
They also will report if you handle them roughly, do not see to their immediate cry of distress, and they will go into the worst kind of hiccuping squall if they need to be burped.
 Yes, I said burped.
 They also make a cooing sound
( sounds like Marilyn Monroe and her speech to Mr. President)...
eeeeeeewwwww!

  Every sound this "real baby", made of plastic and computer chips makes, he is supposed to record in a little book that comes in the diaper bag, that holds diapers with magnetic type closures, two bottles, each carrying a computer chip which communicates with a chip inside the doll.

He has a plastic bracelet with a magnetic key attached to it,  that is permanently, attached to his wrist, for the duration of the three day homework assignment.
 It is the only way to quiet the "real baby" when it gets wound up, or so the little direction booklet tells you.
(HA!)
The real bonus in this homework assignment is that this lovely, dedicated, totally serious teacher is the one who programs the way the "real baby" is timed to do all this wondrous responsibility inducing "stuff".
( I am excited, how about ya'll?)
After I found out this Dedicated Teacher is 25, single, and not a kiddie in sight, I was seriously considering getting a motel room for the 3 days of his homework assignment but, I didn't.
 I have to report, with my entire face hanging out for you to judge, that at 3:30 in the morning, being awakened by a 17 year old male who is almost crying, and the thing from the Chuckie factory is in full wailing mode, is not a pleasant experience, like say helping with trigonometry or physics homework!

 A  phone call at that time in the morning to Ms. Dedicated teacher, did cross my mind!
 Bowing to Jeff's begging me, to just make the thing shut up, and not get him placed on the, "No Christmas Card list",  of his teacher, I promised I would not make that desirous phone call.
 What's a Mom going to do?

That phone call would probably have been the highlight of my entire year.. but I am a wuss.. and I just tried to help him shut up, "The Cyber Horror From Hell", we had in our midst.

Throughout this entire happening, Jeff's' father slept on, blissfully unaware of the chaos surrounding him.
  I have never, in my whole entire time of being a parent, had a child act like this thing did! The pitch of the crying jag it was on, never altered. It was just a constant, and never changing scream! Lord have mercy, I did everything I knew a real baby would respond to. A change, to a hiccuping kind of scream instead of this banshee from hell, kind of mind scrambling thing, we had going on,  would have me feel as though my efforts were successful in some small  way at least.
 I know I shouldn't have, but I got a screwdriver and took the plate off the battery holder and took the batteries out of the thing!

Well a Mom's gotta do what a Mom's gotta do, ya know!
Wonderful silence reigned once again in my home, except for snores from the resident head male anyway.
Jeff,  poor guy, was grateful, but also apprehensive about what his teacher would think, and what kind of grade he would get because of the interference of his parent with his responsibility homework.

 I told him if she gave him any static whatsoever,  to call me, and I would be glad to have a talk with her, and the principal, or the superintendent, and I am best friends with the president of the school board!
If you have power in these situations.. USE IT!
After about 15 minutes, we put the batteries back in cautiously, hoping for a change in mood . Its' eyes rolled wide open, and then the *************ing thing cooed at us!
 We wrote it in the notebook.
 We didn't do anything..... Honest Injun.
 At least that is our story and we are sticking to it.
He had to work the next day, so this brought about cheat number two.  He figured out how to take the magnet part off the bracelet so I could babysit.

 I put "The Resident Evil",  on the bed and went about doing the laundry folding.  It watched me from its spooky plastic eyes, that follow you wherever you go in the room.
 I left the room and located my screwdriver and shoved it in my back pocket, for emergencies and stuff.

 Just in case it did turn out to be the Chuckie Clone, as I suspected....you understand I am sure.
Jeff called to see how his baby was doing, since she had a bad night the night before.
 Maybe this homework assignment has some redeeming qualities, but they are few and far between!

I made it till just about an hour before Jeff. was to be home, and the thing wanted to get a bottle.  It makes these little," gunk, gunk" sounds, and then it coos every minute or so....... and you have to document what sound and the time it makes it, in the little notebook. The thing drank and cooed for 30 minutes....  and then it wanted to be burped.
 But it would not burp.
 I walked around for another 30 minutes bouncing it on my shoulder, patting gently on its back.  Every time I quit walking and patting, the massive earsplitting squall resumed.

 Now remember I had to also write all this down in the book.
It was time for some rescue aide from the grandfather of "The Thing From Cyber Hell"!  To my surprise.. he was willing to help me.

 He even named her Jeffrine!

 Even though he tried all his fatherly tricks, the thing still was not cooperating.
 I suddenly remembered I needed bread, or milk, or maybe mouse traps, olives, crackers...  from the store.
I was not completely cruel..  I left him my screwdriver.
Jeff finally made it home and took over.
  At 2 a.m. I was still awake, listening to Jeff trying his best to do the assignment correctly, and failing miserably.  I finally got up and gave him the screwdriver. He accepted it with a slight nod of thanks, and I left quietly while he did what had to be done.

Sure wished I had promised not to call Miss Dedicated Teacher... but a promise is a promise..
I didn't promise anything about taking on the entire school system if he got a failing grade .. though.. did I?
All in all, he got a 92 on his homework, and the teacher had no inkling that the batteries had been removed.

 I really regret not getting a recording of the banshee scream. It might be the piece of evidence that some future parent needs to get out of an assault and battery charge pressed by The Dedicated Teacher.
 Hey, I am always there for a fellow tortured parent if needed, don't cha know!
As for Jeff and I..
. We did nothing at all that was not within the guidelines ...
 We were responsible and took care of the "real baby", in the best and most successful parenting way known to any human being, taking care of a microchip and plastic "Chuckie Clone".
That's our story and we are sticking to it... forever!


The End
Terri McCain/lockerridge

For more poems and stories click the link below
UNITED FRIENDS WRITERS GROUP


lockerridge
 

Saturday, May 9, 2009

Paint.NET - Download


http://www.getpaint.net/download.html#download
About
Paint.NET is free image and photo editing software for computers that run Windows. It features an intuitive and innovative user interface with support for layers, unlimited undo, special effects, and a wide variety of useful and powerful tools. An active and growing online community provides friendly help, tutorials, and plugins.
It started development as an undergraduate college senior design project mentored by Microsoft, and is currently being maintained by some of the alumni that originally worked on it. Originally intended as a free replacement for the Microsoft Paint software that comes with Windows, it has grown into a powerful yet simple image and photo editor tool. It has been compared to other digital photo editing software packages
such as Adobe® Photoshop®, Corel® Paint Shop Pro®, Microsoft Photo Editor, and The GIMP.

Friday, May 8, 2009

MAY 8, 2009... UNITED FRIENDS CHALLENGE NUMBER ONE HUNDRED FORTY TWO.. THE LYSOL BLUES

MAY 8, 2009...
UNITED FRIENDS CHALLENGE
NUMBER
ONE HUNDRED FORTY TWO..
  THE LYSOL BLUES






Caffeinatedjo's Challenge
Imagine you are a country song. A very twangy, full of angst country song.
Write the words and/or chorus to your song, including the line:
"I found a moldy potato under my fridge."
Please Note: Rhyming is optional.



 
THE LYSOL BLUES


Where have all my friends gone
What can I do to bring them back
Where oh where are my dog and cat
I feel so lost and alone, I opened up the door
And the neighbors ran from the smell
Coming from the wind blown
  Out from my home
chorus
I been sprayin'
and prayin'
gallons of Lysol I have been buyin'
losing this smell is so tryin'
I got the lysol blues
Searchin' for the source
Of this stench is taking a long course
No one will help me
I am so filled with remorse
No one will come near me
The smell has invaded  my clothes
My hair, even my bath robe
Why has this happened to me
Momma oh Momma what can it be
chorus
I been sprayin'
and prayin'
gallons of Lysol I have been buyin'
losing this smell is so tryin'
I got the lysol blues
I may have the answer
If I do I will become a happy dancer
I peered beneath my refrigerator today
To give that hidden place a good spray
I saw the problem way back in the dark
  A moldy tater had chosen that place to park
chorus
I been sprayin'
and prayin'
gallons of Lysol I have been buyin'
losing this smell is so tryin'
I got the lysol blues
I sprayed and I prayed
I heaved and I shoved
That fridge just won't budge!
What can I do now
Where will I turn
To the internet is my last hope
To rid myself of this moldy tater
It is the only thing left to me
Oh please bring me a train full of help
I just can't cope!
chorus
I been sprayin'
and prayin'
gallons of Lysol I have been buyin'
losing this smell is so tryin'
I got the lysol blues

I posted an ad in Craigs List
The one place I knew that they would get my jist
"Please come to the rescue!"
"I found a moldy potato under my fridge"
ohhhhhhh ....

I been sprayin'
and prayin'
gallons of lysol I been buyin'
losing this smell in so tryin'
I got the lysol blues
They came  and they dug out that moldy tater
They heaved and shoved and ran the water hose
I sprayed and I prayed
I mopped and I sprayed
Then I opened up the door
And my neighbors sniffed the air
They came  to give me a hug
But left until I sprayed the living room rug
Happiest of days are now mine
Even my dog and my cat I did find
I had a smile on my face..
until..
I opened the bill from the cleaning crew
Now I sing a new song about a different kind of blues
I got the bankruptcy court bluessssssssss!

AHHHHA....

Terri McCain/lockerridge


For more poems and stories click the link below
UNITED FRIENDS WRITERS GROUP


lockerridge

Thursday, May 7, 2009

MAY 7, 2009 UNITED FRIENDS CHALLENGE NUMBER ONE HUNDRED FORTY ONE... HENRIETTA HORTENSE HUGGINS

MAY 7, 2009
UNITED FRIENDS CHALLENGE
  NUMBER
ONE HUNDRED FORTY ONE...
   HENRIETTA  HORTENSE  HUGGINS
   


Tiger's Challenge
 Write a story about a chamberpot, using the words:
 - Teddybear
 - 7 o'clock
 - Locked door
 - Surprise
Henrietta Hortense Huggins stepped off the train station platform with a weary step, and was immediately assailed by the smell of the stockyards, located along side of the train station.
If this was any indication of the type of town she was in, she was glad she had packed her chamber pot in her trunk. No middle of the night outhouse excursions for Henrietta, if she could help it!
The smell from the stockyard was horrendous!
Searching in her ladies reticule she retrieved her hankie, soaked in an extra heavy mixture of rose water.
Even with the linen and lace hankie held over her small snub nose, her gag reflex asserted itself. Mortified at her unladylike actions, Henrietta ducked her head and walked swiftly toward the ticket masters office.,  to find a locked door.
  Suddenly, her corset felt as though it had shrank 2 sizes, and she could not catch a breath at all.. Images started to grow a fuzzy outline around them, and she knew what was about to happen next, and it did.
  Bam! Henrietta Hortense Huggins hit the dirty boards on the platform, in a dead faint.
When she started to come around, someone was waving a small container of ammonia beneath her nose, the first thing she saw was a small child holding a stuffed animal. Which by the looks of it was supposed to be a bear.
She shook her head to clear the cobwebs, and the little child said," Daddy I think the lady is awake now, Teddy said he thinks she might have a bump on her head, and you should kiss it and make it all better."
Henrietta let out a small shriek and sat up too quickly, the room began to swim in waves once again, and then someone put the bottle of ammonia under her nose again, just as she took a deep breath.
That did the trick alright, she fairly jumped up onto her feet and started to back up quickly as a tall man who looked to be in his early thirties brandished the ammonia bottle toward her again. She managed to croak," No! No! I am fine now, really I do not need more smelling salts administered to me!" The man smiled, and Henrietta noticed he had really perfect teeth, white and straight,  the perfect size for his face.  A very nice face now that she thought about it.
" If your sure your not going to hit the floor again Miss, I will give this back to Mr. Miles over there." he said with that smile that was simply sparkling, as were his deep cobalt blue eyes.  A hint of laughter lurked in there also.
  " Oh yes, I am quite sure sir... quite sure!" exclaimed Henrietta. She remembered her reason for the trip to the ticket masters office, before the regrettable occurrence, and enquired of the stranger, " I am to meet a Mr. McCoy here today,  he was to send someone to collect me, he has employed me to be his child's governess, do you know of the gentleman?"
The child which had been hiding behind the man's leg all this time, stepped forward saying, " That is my last name, McCoy, This is my Daddy, Markus McCoy, and this is Teddy the Bear." " I just call him Teddy Bear for short."
Markus McCoy, looked startled for a moment before he regained his composure and asked, " Your Miss Huggins?"
Henrietta felt the surprise in his voice more than she heard it. Drawing herself up to her diminutive height of 5 ft. 1 inch, she replied, " Yes, I am Henrietta Huggins, and Mr. McCoy promised someone would meet me here at the train station at 7 o'clock, to transport me to his home.."
Markus shook his head of brown overly long hair, thinking to himself, "I am the luckiest man alive, not only am I the richest man in the territory, I advertised for a governess for Billie Jean and the Good Lord sent me an angel straight from heaven!"
"I wonder if she brought that chamber pot she inquired about in the letter asking what she would need to bring with her to be comfortable here in McCoyville?
THE END
Terri McCain/lockerridge
For more poems and stories click the link below
UNITED FRIENDS WRITERS GROUP


lockerridge

Monday, May 4, 2009

MAY 4, 2009 IMAGES OF LIFE IN LOCKIE LAND TODAY

MAY 4, 2009  IMAGES OF LIFE IN LOCKIE LAND TODAY

I have been taking a few photos lately and have not shared any in a long time, so on a rainy Monday, when I should be doing other things .. I am playing on the computer! lol
No one else does this I am sure!!!
 The collage above is of my wigela bush in my backyard. It is so pretty this year! I have some iris this year.. but it is not a good year for them, the wind has been might rough on them. Lot of broken stalks, and just torn up flowers, from nothing more than wind.
  But the wigela is  going strong and so I will share its beauty with you.. The butterflies are swarming it! All kinds... Painted Ladies, and Monarch, Butter Bits, Swallow Tails, and I even found a Lumina on it, one morning last week.. Those moths are so gorgeous!
This comparison is of the same place on the creek, taken from the same spot. It has rained and rained until the creeks can't hold it all any longer, and the river has jumped its banks also.
I couldn't even get down to the place the one photo was taken.. the water is all the way up to the entrance to the fishing hole!
I found these yesterday on the side of the road by the creek. This is a wonderful wild flower that goes by the name of Solomons Seal. I have always loved these plants, have tried to transplant them many times.. but it just is not to be.. they pick their home and won't be moved!
Now we get to the inside of the house. Here is the newest member of my household. Good ole "Jackson the Parrot Dog"!
He loves to crawl up on Gary's arm and go to sleep.. snoring sleep .. deep puppy sleep!I have never seen a dog do this kind of thing before, ever.. the top picture is more in keeping with what dogs will usually do when they sleep. Jackson has not sprouted any tail feathers yet so we are hoping it is just a passing phase.
 If it isn't, well Gary needs to start lifting weights.. because this little guy is growing by leaps and bounds, and pretty soon, he is going to be quite a chunk of weight to let sleep on his shoulder.
He wants to sleep in the bed, so I let him. I wake up in the mornings and he is up on the top of my pillow with his head laid on the top of mine.. go figure!
I will finish up with a little video that will show you that my suspicion that Jackson has ADD is well founded.. lol.. hope you enjoyed the tour of the things in Lockie Land in May 2009.
 I enjoyed presenting them to you!
lockerridge

MAY 4, 2009 THIS IS JUST PRETTY DARN COOL!


MAY 4, 2009
THIS IS
JUST PRETTY
DARN COOL!
My Auntie J. sent an email to me with this link to look into.. so I did..
 I liked what I saw for sure!
It beats the heck out of the news sites, and their continuous doom to America via the world ..
 be it terrorism or pig snotty nose killer viruses..
 it is always a real uplifting thing to do..
yes sir ..
the news is really just GREAT all the time huh?.
NOT!
So when this showed up on the screen, I was pleasantly surprised!
This group of people are moving along pretty quickly with over 6 million hits to this website when I was there early yesterday morning.
 This is the video and the song they sing..
 I placed the url to the site at the bottom..
I signed my name to their petition

 I also sent this url to my congressman,
 in his weekly wipe up email from me..
.lol..

 He always writes back,
Not a form letter either!
Either I have a really great representative..
Or he picked me to write to,
 because I am on his ass constantly!

Since the fiasco our country has fallen into
due the actions of those we trusted..
We are advised to
 make them be accountable
 for all actions they take
So I figured I ought to try it out.

 I am making the most of the
opportunity to learn a new skill,

Babysitting a government full of spoiled rotten brats
is kind of fun, if you go about it, with the right attitude.
After all.. they asked for it.. didn't they?
 
I love the smell of harassment in the mornings!





BORN AGAIN IN AMERICA


lockerridge

Thursday, April 30, 2009

APRIL 30, 2009 THIS IS MY OPINION... WHAT IS YOURS?

APRIL 30, 2009
THIS IS MY OPINION...
WHAT IS YOURS?


In 2006 there were a lot of rumors flying all over the news and internet emailing routes finding its way into in boxes and living rooms all over the world. The focus of the rumor was the song "In God We Trust" performed by the country music group Diamond Rio.
 Those rumors were nothing more than that.. inflammatory rumors. They told of radio stations not playing the song due to its content, saying the lyrics were politically incorrect and therefore in violation of the constitutional freedoms laid down in Article 1 of the Bill of Rights.
 That was so false! The reason for the song not getting any airtime was, Diamond Rio only released the song in their greatest hits album and never in a single. This is the normal  vehicle needed to be played on the radio stations and climb in the ratings or not. The group decided that the best way to make this song  lasting and meaningful, to their fans, was to only perform it at concerts. When it was being performed by the group, there were many other patriotic songs also on the airwaves, such as Toby Keith's, The Red White and Blue. Diamond Rio made the decision to keep it special by only performing at their concerts.
   But recently it has been actually banned by a judge, from being used in an elementary school program. Two students parents were the reason it was brought before a judge in the first place. These two students parents, four people, managed to bring the government into something religious in nature.
  ( A federal judge Wednesday ordered a St. Johns County elementary school to not have students rehearse a religious-themed song once scheduled for a year-end assembly.
     The preliminary injunction against rehearsing country group Diamond Rio’s “In God We Still Trust” says the lyrics “take aim at one [of] our nation’s fundamental principles: the separation of church and state.”
   U.S. District Judge Harvey Schlesinger concluded that “the public interest is well served in preventing the coercion of third-grade students to participate in a state sponsored performance that endorses such an opinion.”
 The Diamond Rio song, the judge wrote, is "a patently religious and proselyting piece" that crosses a line by advocating a specific religious view.
 The ruling referenced parts of the song's lyrics that say: "There's no separation. ... We're one nation under Him ... Now there are those among us who want to push Him out and erase His name from everything this country is all about ... Now it's time for all believers to make our voices heard.")
  http://www.jacksonville.com/news/metro/2009-04-16/story/judge_bans_in_god_we_still_trust_from_st_johns_schools_assembly

 http://www.news4jax.com/news/19201202/detail.html#-

 Why were they able to do this?
 When have the feelings of a few become the normal way of things being decided for the majority?
 We live in a democracy in the United States of America. Democracy does not mean that we all get what we want all the time! Democracy means the majority .. not the minority .. of the people!
 The image at the top of this blog are the words written so long ago by the ones who helped found the nation,which has become great in the eyes of the world.
If you read it, and don't try to put anything other than what it says in reality, it says the government has no place at any time involving itself in our religious beliefs. It does not make a difference in any kind of belief. It just says .. it will not happen. Yet those four people were allowed to drag it into the court for a ruling on a religious basis.
 Things like this that are happening all over this country are what is causing the breakdown of our country on a basic building block destruction.
 If those parents did not appreciate or agree with the song being included in the program at school, then they should have taken their children out of the program.
 If only four of them took exception.. it would seem to me that the MAJORITY of the others did not.. am I correct in this assumption folks?
 The freedom to pull their children from the program, if it offended them, is freedom enough it would seem to me. The kids were not being MADE to be a part of it. They had the freedom of choice well served in that alone. But they chose to get the court involved and put a restriction on everyone elses' freedom of choice, by the judge being made to make a ruling on the complaint.
 That judge was looking to make a name for himself in the newspapers if you ask me.
That case should have been thrown in the trash when the judge first looked at, and those stupid lawyers who brought it to him, told to stop wasting the courts time with frivolous suits or risk having themselves brought up on charges!  That would have served the constitution better than what he did.
 Is it a wonder that the nation is in dire straits for new teachers? I know if I was college bound in this day, I would think hard about going for a teaching certificate! The states regard the school systems as something less than needing attention and funding, and they provide no protection for the teachers who are harassed, maligned, and literally paid a bit more than minimum wages.
 It is time to rethink and regroup folks.

I am a Christian, make no mistake in whom and what I believe in. I worship God the Father, I am soul saved by Jesus Christ, and I am led and taught by The Holy Spirit.
   But I am of the opinion that if we do not do something soon about this government entering into our children's lives, through the schools, soon we will lose our children to the government through those same schools.
   Think about this..
School nurses are prevented from giving our kids an aspirin if they have a headache, but they are free to hand out condoms.
Teachers are required to teach, that same sex marriage is just another life style, and perfectly okay.
   This is an opinion of myself.. and I would very much like to know what you all think along these lines also.  I am troubled deep down about all this.
 In my state I see children being commanded to undergo the fat pinch test. If the nurse is able to pinch more than inch of body fat on a child.. those children are then required to go into a physical exercise class, this is a separate class from PE..
 The school sends check lists to parents to tell them if their child is overweight and how to feed their kids. If the kid comes in okay in the body fat requirements.. then they send out check lists on how to maintain that weight in their kids.. and they actually .. now this just made me want to hit someone.. they actually COMMEND.. and pat on the back in those check lists!
 All I know is this.. my grandchildren should not have to worry about that kind of stuff at school, school is to teach them the tools their brains need to make their way in life, not what they should weigh and then force them into a program which is not Physical Education at all..
 it is Nazi Fat Concentration Camp!
With a agenda of making everyone the same, placing their reasoning for doing so on "It is for our own good"...
 Which when you think about it, is the exact opposite of what the court is doing with upholding the individual rights in religious suits brought before them.

If they would stop putting up all the findings of the studies being done on everything from the effect of whiskey on tsetse flies to ignoring the damage being done to the environment by the space shuttle and launching of satellites  into outer space, as what is best for me... and leave us alone about the BEST way to live .. we just might not have so many people on anti depressants, suffering from ulcers, and in need of national health insurance.

I am sending an email to my representative and including a link to this blog.. so bring on the comments my friends.. maybe they will get read by someone who has a dab of power over the way things are handled in our country.
   Which way is it going to be, is it going to be a government by the people and for the people, or it is going to be a government for the individual and by the individual?
 
 
     You place your hand on His Bible, when you swear to tell the Truth
     His name is on our greatest Monuments, and all our money too,
     And when we Pledge allegiance, there’s no doubt where we stand,
     There is no separation, we’re one Nation under Him.
     Chorus:
     In God We Still Trust
     Here in America
     He’s the one we turn to every time
     The going’ gets rough
     He is the source of all our Strength
     The One who watches over us
     Here in America
     In God We Still Trust
     Now there are those among us, who want to push Him out,
     And erase His name from everything, this country’s all about,
     From the Schoolhouse to the Courthouse, they’re Silencing His Word,
     Now it’s time for all Believers, to make our Voices heard.
    chorus
     Here in America
     Here in America
     Here in America,
     In God We Still Trust
     Here in America,
     In God We Still Trust
     Here in America
 
lockerridge

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

APRIL 29, 2009 A LOCKIE WEDNESDAY FUNNY FIND


APRIL 29, 2009
A
  LOCKIE
WEDNESDAY
FUNNY FIND


THE BLACK PANTIES
   Anna had lost her husband almost four years ago. Her daughter was constantly calling her and urging her to get back into the world.

Finally, Anna said she'd go out, but didn't know anyone.
 Her daughter immediately replied, "Mom! I have someone for you to meet."
Well, it was an immediate hit. They took to one another and after dating for six weeks, he asked her to join him for a weekend in Vermont.

Their first night there, she undressed as he did.
There she stood nude, except for a pair of black lacy panties, he was in his birthday suit.
Looking her over, he asked, "Why the black panties?"
She replied: "My breasts you can fondle, my body is yours to explore, but down there I am still in mourning."
He knew he was not getting lucky that night.
  The following night was the same.
 She stood there wearing the black panties, and he was in his birthday suit.
 Except, now he was wearing a black condom.
She looked at him and asked: "What's with the black condom?"
 He replied, "I want to offer my deepest condolences".







lockerridge

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

APRIL 22, 2009 HAPPY EARTH DAY EARTHLINGS!

APRIL 22, 2009
HAPPY
EARTH DAY
EARTHLINGS!
  




HAPPY
  EARTH DAY
EARTHLINGS!


Photobucket





THAT STUFF IN THAT JUG...
   IS MIGHTY POTENT!
MUST BE SOME KIND OF
"CREATE A CRITTER"
 SPRING TONIC!
   WHOA!

 YYYEEEEHHHAAAWWW

BABBBBYYYY!

lockerridge

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

APRIL 21, 2009 UNITED FRIENDS CHALLENGE NUMBER ONE HUNDRED AND THRITY SEVEN... WHOA! I AM DEFINTELY NOT IN ARKANSAS ANYMORE!

APRIL 21, 2009
UNITED FRIENDS CHALLENGE
  NUMBER ONE HUNDRED AND THIRTY SEVEN...
WHOA!
  I AM DEFINITELY
NOT IN ARKANSAS ANYMORE!
 

Skyerider's Challenge
This is an exercise in first person POV (point of view). Write the story completely through the character's eyes. You MAY NOT jump to anyone else's point of view. Here's the scenario and the first paragraph to get you started...
You wake up in a strange room. In your story have your main character discover WHERE he/she is, WHY he/she's there, and HOW he/she got there. If you write a time travel story or an alternate dimension story, also have him/her discover WHEN he/she is. Remember, it's all written from his/her point of view.
"I woke up to the smell of frying bacon. My first realization of the day was that I was starving! Groaning, I rolled over without opening my eyes and felt for my watch on my nightstand to see what time it was. Except there was no nightstand! I sat up quickly. This wasn't my room! What was going on? Where was I?"

This post is the property of Vinnie Parker.. .. . given as gift by Terri McCain
All rights therefore belong to Vinnie Parker.
Vinnie and Flask are copyrighted trademark symbols
and are the sole property of Vinnie Parker.


"I woke up to the smell of frying bacon. My first realization of the day was that I was starving! Groaning, I rolled over without opening my eyes and felt for my watch on my nightstand to see what time it was. Except there was no nightstand! I sat up quickly. This wasn't my room! What was going on?
 Where was I?"
"Okay Terri, don't lose what little sanity you have left here." I thought, with only one jump in blood pressure and blurring of vision. My thought pattern cleared somewhat and I decided to shut my eyes again and think of nothing .. nothing at all and then open them up slowly this time. Okay, this is good.. things are not weird now.. they are just black.. wait what are those stripes of flashing light I see..
  OMG!
  ITS ALIENS ..
I HAVE BEEN ABDUCTED BY ALIENS!
 OMG! OMG!...

 O..M... G... !!!!!!
Woman get a big hold on yourself now!  Okay, just relax your eyeballs a bit... whew!..  I got to remember, for future reference.
 "Do not scrunch up your eyes really tight.. you see bars of flashing light when you do that."
"Okay... take it slow now.. crack one eye open just a bit... now the other... now both of them really fast!"
My thoughts on my surroundings got a bit more stable when I realized I was lying on a rather large air mattress with a clean sheet on it, and the bacon smell was just lovely! The connection between bacon and maybe gravy, even a biscuit maybe occurred to me.
This place might not be so bad, but it was not where I should be at all.
"Let me see.. what was the last thing I remember?"
humm...
Then I heard a sound, sort of like something being dragged along a cement sidewalk... it was getting closer whatever it was!
"OMG! OMG! OMG! ..."

Then all got quiet... except the room got rather warm, rather quickly... I opened one eye a slit..
and......
"OMG!  OMG!  OMG!
 ITS A SNAKE.!
 IT IS A FREAKING SNAKE.!
WHY DID IT HAVE TO BE A SNAKE.!
 I HATE SNAKES! "
Then this really amused voice, which sounded like a young man said, " Terri, you can open your eyes, I am in not in any kind of mood to roast, toast, or BBQ right now... Vinnie almost has breakfast ready. Are you hungry?"
I opened my eyes and what the heck?
I recognized the being sticking its snout around the door sill ...
 "Flask?"
A puff of smoke blew smoke rings from his nose and he chuckled, " One and the same, long time no see friend!" The smoke rings grew larger as he chuckled and I thought for a minute that I was surely just on another one of those flash backs they talk about if you mix cold medicines. .. but I wasn't sick..
Was I?
I tried to smile a confident smile at the very large lizard who was probably the reason the surgeon general put those warnings on cigarette packages.. and said,
" Sure I am always hungry, I will be right out!"

I attempted to actually say all that without stuttering, and it worked apparently, because he puffed a couple more smoke rings at me and started to back up.  His head was the only thing, small enough to get into the doorway.
I sat up straight in the bed and realized, somehow, someway, for some as of yet unknown reason, I had been placed into one of Vinnie's books.
 So in keeping with the fact that Vinnie is my friend, and I had been the one to give her the dragon egg that turned into Flask.. maybe she would not let him eat me instead of the bacon.
So my confidence bolstered a bit, I managed to get out of bed and then I realized, I had on my nightgown.
Boy, Vinnie you got some explaining to do woman..
 cause this just ain't right now!
 I stopped on that thought for a second,

 " What if she had no idea how I  had gotten here?"

 " What if I have to stay here?"

" I still have so much work to do on the remodeling of the house, the garden needs hoed out, and Homer will starve to death if I am not there to cook for him!"

I took another couple of minutes to let that kind of soak in to my consciousness.. and then I grinned...
"Maybe I could squeeze in a couple weeks vacation here on Shree or Lanka, or where ever this particular episode was located."
I stopped and thought on that one more than a couple seconds and decided..

 Maybe .. I wouldn't even ask!

With a skip to my step. I traveled down the hall. following my nose to the bacon.
And there was my buddy Vinnie,
just taking those biscuits out of the oven..
 umm umm ummm..
 I think I like being lost in space!
Over eating a fantastic breakfast Vinnie gave me the downlow or the lowdown, depending on which dictionary you favor, on what had happened.
Apparently, Vinnie and Flask had been listening to me over the almost four years now.. saying I was going to get busy on the house and move in to it... and being the intelligent woman and reptile duo, they decided to give me a little break before they took me back to the world of...

YUCK!

 reality....

They contacted Homer, and he knew that I would not get out of my computer chair long enough to actually go visit a friend, so they hatched the plot to whisk me away in the night.
This being possible without me being wiser for it..
.Because 
 Homer had doctored my Coca Cola
 with  Nyquil...
This would have to be discussed at length once I arrived home.. but for the next two weeks, I have my very own hot tub maker at my service and the company of one
of the finest friends I have ever had.

I think I like being a story book character...

The food is simply wonderful!

 Flask can BBQ like nobody else in the world!

The End

 Terri McCain/lockerridge
for
Vinnie Parker
visit Vinnie and Flask online
and look through some of their adventures
at the link below
vinnie and flask
For more poems and stories click the link below
UNITED FRIENDS WRITERS GROUP




lockerridge