AUGUST 29, 2009 MORE ABOUT THE MATTER WITH LOCKIES HEART DAY TWO..
AUGUST 29, 2009 MORE ABOUT THE MATTER WITH LOCKIES HEART DAY TWO... EVERYTHING I OWN..
DAY TWO OF THE BROKEN LOCKIE HEARTED...
Well I have been blessed with the knowledge, that your friend Lockie, is well into full fledged double time menopause.
I have to go back on the ninth and get the results of the blood workup, and then he will write out the first in the trial and error of finding HRT to give me enough hormones, to not be a crazy lune. I have been so totally against using HRT for any reason... that this feels so like I am betraying my own trust and values. But if it can keep me in my relationship with Homer.. I will try anything.. I have not had the opportunity to explain what is making me such a mood shifting creature from the Black Lagoon for the past year. I hope he does what he does so well.. just sigh.. give me a hug and a kiss and tell me.. "Well I knew something was wrong with you but you just couldn't see it when I said something.. you just didn't want me in the same air space as you... I ain't going anywhere .. "
Let us pray folks.. let us pray..
This song is about Homer/Gary/PoorSmuck...
Everything Thing I Own
by the group Bread
1984
You sheltered me from harm.Kept me warm, kept me warm You gave my life to me Set me free, Set me free The finest years I ever knew were all the years I had with you
I would give anything I own,Give up my life, my heart, my home.I would give everything I own,just to have you back again.
You taught me how to love,What it's of, what it's of.You never said too much,but still you showed the way,and I knew from watching you.Nobody else could ever know the part of me that can't let go.
I would give anything I own,Give up my life, my heart, my home.I would give everything I own Just to have you back again.
Is there someone you know,you're loving them so,but taking them all for granted.You may lose them one day,someone takes them away,and they don't hear the words you long to say
I would give anything I own,Give up my life, my heart, my home.I would give everything I own Just to have you back again.Just to touch you once again
lockerridge
Menopause is a bitch, I hope your doctor finds the right hormone treatment for you and that things work out for you and Homer. Hang in there Lockie, you are a tough gal and I know you will win this battle too.
ReplyDeleteto not be a crazy lune
ReplyDeleteEr, how would we know the difference? *grin*
glad to know how you are doing and that you guys are trying to work things out.........will keep you in my prayers.
ReplyDeleteBless your heart Lockie!!! Been there....gone thru that! I had such horrible night sweats and mood swings I'm surprised I still have a best friend and/or a job! lol..... Let your doctor take care of this for ya....trust him or her! Get to feeling better my friend!
ReplyDelete((huggs))
I can totally relate to the menopause thing. So glad you went to the doctor, Lockie. The HRT will help you. You'll be feeling better soon.
ReplyDeleteBIG HUGS
Yeah... I'm going through Menopause.. Have been..
ReplyDeleteYou are taking the blame... You are not suppose to take the blame.
Just today.. I was in a fantastic mood! Went to get a glass of pepsi more than half gone.. I threw the damn bottle into the sink! Poured out what was left.. Game in the LR. sat down.. left the room in tears.. Kids Sat quiet.. Tom asked repeatedly what was wrong.. I went into the bathroom and cried - cause I have no soda.. because I was a bitch..
Tom does not go to work and then not come home for hours and not call and not answer his phone..
The main details of Menopause I will not go into because EEeewwwwww. mixed readers.. and no one wants to hear it..
But be you a crazy woman or be you a door mat.. DO NOT TAKE THE RESPONSIBILITY!!
Work it out.. changed what can be changed.. Set down rules.. If he once again breaks those - Not calling - have an idea of where he is - but no phone call. If the two of you are still not doing things together - even if that is one reading and one watching TV (in the same room... Call it quits.. I know easier said than done.. easier said than done..
I want for you happiness.. calmness.. I want for you to be true to you..
Menopause is tough.. I'm sitting in front of the A/C and still sweating!! But it is not a reason for HIS behavior..
I hope the HRT works for you.
I had to stop.. Because of headache.. cramps.. sleeping all the time.. Changed doses.. Found breast lumps.. soreness. (worse than when I was prego) increased the growth of the Fibroids... It was just not worth it.. Those around me told me I was calmer.. I could tell a difference in my skin.. Now I take my chances..
Some times I am a slam'n Be'atch! But on the other hand.. I know women who have had a good experience with the HRT.
Stay on top of the doctor appointments.
Love ya.
If Homer is who you want.. then give it your all..
ReplyDeleteBut remember the truth of what would upset you. ok? I just love ya..
Dani I have not seen him to tell him what the doc said.. he is still not talking unless he wants to and then he gets my hopes up and then just shits on me..
ReplyDeleteActually I have come to myself enough to realize that I need to get with the remodel program here if I am to be in the house before cold weather hits me.
I made Homer an offer that was a really huge offer for me to do.. I offered to sell the house and move this trailer to his property .. and I got the usual.. "I just don't know" sighing reply.
So I suppose I have to assume he is not interested. He would like it probably if I moved it up there and gave it to him and I lived in the house.. but you know what.. the monkey with one ball and a bald head will fly over Venus first!!!
I see a window of hope in this post. I am still in your corner, hoping things work out. However is best for you...
ReplyDeleteI think this realization is a HUGE step....
Homer's a gem!
ReplyDeleteI paused a long time ago....I must've really strained people and don't even know it - still!!! me bad...
The flashes were the worst part for me...I didn't break into a sweat (thank God!!!). It would look like a thermometer rising...could literally see the red starting at the chest, neck by the time it got to my face, it looked like I was about to implode!
I never did the HRT...it was still very contraversial 10 years ago...Hope they've worked things out...
Let me know how it goes. Be careful, be just as watchful for side effects that are worse than a man having to just deal with it! (lol) just sayin...I luv ya..
Dido!!
ReplyDeleteJust today.. I was stomping and flinging purse and clothes around - because I got roped into going to the next town.. I had not planned on going.. knew I would - but thought Tom was going ( all signs pointed to him going) Till BAHM!! Well you feel like going? ALWAYS MEANS HE IS NOT!! I was pissed! Why? Because I had to get off of my lazy butt? No.... Because it was his idea. was his shopping list.. was his intentions to rope me into it!!! EVERYDAY!! I go to town.. No pay check for two weeks now.. Don't need to go to town!!
Glad at this point to get away - YES. Still I was pissy - to family, to store employees.. in traffic!!
No one walked out.. no one has not 'not called'.. no one is pouting..
They all know mom is in a mood.. ask whats wrong get more huffing and stomping.. THEN!... I was picking on how the dishwasher was loaded.. I took most out (MID CYCLE!!) rea arranged - added more dishes.. went outside sat on the steps ((cause I know I was being a butt head - but couldn't control or stop it.)
Love you..
The last two lines of the song well states your mind Lockie.
ReplyDeleteMenopause is a natural process for which someone getting blamed is not acceptable, I wish and prays that the HRT will bring some happiness in your relation, Lockie I can see that you are literally ready to do anything to keep the relation especially on the comment you wrote to Dani ready gave up this much and homer do not care!!, and as Dani said you are taking the blame if you feel that it would help itz fine.
Love you Lockie
m'wah!! We all love you babes!!!...
ReplyDelete